The following is a statement on recent events which occurred at the office of Evil Objective Studios.
Filthy. Freezing. Kinda smelly. These are just four of the five words used to describe the scene in an Alberta basement Monday morning where three of the studio’s designers were found. Tired, cold, and mildly infuriated with one another, the trio had been held hostage for months by their own iOS game.
Details are sparse but it appears the three friends – who have no professional or practical experience in much of anything – were taken hostage by their iOS game “Scribble Byte Scramble” at some point early in development.
Authorities suspect the trio was likely unaware of the dangers of game development.
Possessing little money and even less sanity, the trio aimed to develop and release their game on a timeline and budget that was initially described as ‘brilliant’ – it has since been downgraded to ‘laughable’.
The whereabouts of “Scribble Byte Scramble” – the game responsible for this catastrophe – are unknown, but it is expected to resurface in early September. Rumours suggest the trio are currently in recovery, receiving extensive treatments from an Italian pharmaceutical specialist.